Thursday, September 29, 2011

Rise Above

Individuals with a Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) or any other disability for that matter need others to encourage them to press on and rise above their limitations. The best thing one can do for a loved one that has suffered a TBI or has any other form of disability, is to never let them stay stuck where they are, but rather encourage them to aim higher. We at TBI Hope attempted to do so on September 23, 2011 by creating a special day called Survivor Day in which we gave 10 TBI Survivor's the platform to share their story of recovery and encourage others in similar situations to persevere and never give up!

There were many wonderful things said on Survivor Day by our featured guests that I would now like to share with you all:

Debbie Leonhardt a TBI Survivor and Licensed Counselor along with her client, also a TBI Survivor Stacey McKinney stated that a method that worked for them was to break down a large task into small manageable pieces and then complete them in order until the large task is complete. Debbie stated that, "It all comes down to quality of life and to live in the present-appreciate today." A line that Debbie shared that I will never forget is, " You are not just a Survivor and therefore that should not be your focus in life. You need to move from a Survivor mentality to Thriver and move to what you can fully be."

After Debbie and Stacey finished sharing, TBI Thriver Doreen Carson shared her story with Pat Benfield her Neurofeedback Provider and Clinician.  Doreen shared that the journey of healing comes from every direction and that determination is the key to recovery. Doreen pointed out, "we all need help with the new stuff so we can let go of the old stuff." Pat Benfield pointed out that a TBI can leave an individual emotionally stunted in different developmental areas for this reason Doreen's method of taking everything one step at a time is the way to go.

Pat Benfield also shared along with TBI Thriver Michael Dedmon who lost a son to an accident and then received a TBI from a different car accident himself. It was a pleasure seeing Michael share his heart and passion and how he feels the need to create a sense of awareness. Michael stated that for him what helped in his recovery was "accepting the new challenges and the change that came with them." Michael now has a foundation that bring awareness to helmet safety to protect others from receiving a TBI.


William Boggs really drove the point home during his time of sharing when he encouraged the audience to "always reach for another level in your recovery." William encouraged the audience through his recovery story to find their purpose after a TBI. William pointed out that acquiring a TBI does not take away your purpose....it simply redefines it." After William shared, Anthony Zordano shared his Survivor story that occurred while he was still in high school. He encouraged others to also keep pressing on and to remember to laugh despite your circumstance.  Anthony shared his ups and downs on trying to get accepted into school or simply passing a class, but decided to never give up! Anthony is now working on his degree to become a Substance Abuse Counselor. Anthony stated, "This is your recovery process, take ownership of it."

Kirk Wilder inspired us all when he shared his story four words at a time. Kirk survived a stab wound to the head when he attempted to be a peacemaker at a frat party and went in to break up a fight. Many years later Kirk now attends a day program at Hinds Feet in Asheville and makes beautiful wooden bowls. He along with his Provider, the Day Program Director at Hinds Feet Erica Engelsman shared how in a split second life can change completely. Kirk truly was an inspiration to press on your limitations as he demonstrated a device that was created for him to better make wooden bowls and go turkey hunting. Kirk being able to only speak in 4 -5 word sentences at a time shared his story in front of an audience that attentively listened to every word he spoke. Kirk ended his story with a thank you for such a "Special Day."

It truly was a special day! Kirk found the perfect words to describe our Survivor Day. Another Hinds Feet Day program attendee and Thriver Drew Carter shared with us his story. After dropping some rhymes and sharing his heart to dance and work with children Drew left us with the charge to be persistent and always aim up. This charge may seem so simple, yet its profound. So long as you aim up, you don't look down and you are pressing on to new levels in your life.

Following Drew's charge to aim up, Joe Barrett who is on staff at Hinds Feet in Asheville and works as the Day Program Coordinator shared with us his story of receiving a mild TBI after a biking accident. Joe's story was uniquely presented as he shared his story through the eyes of his friends who were there throughout the accident and initial stages of recovery. Joe pointed out that there were incredible people along the way that did not even know him that advocated on his behalf. He pointed out that the human heart that is driven by compassion is truly beautiful and beyond comprehension. Joe stated that after he received his mild TBI he felt an urgency, a desire to live more because life clearly was not over for him. His charge to the TBI Thriver was to "live more because it isn't over!"

Our special Survivor Day came to a conclusion as our last featured guest Jashun Gaddy-Gaskin shared his story of pressing on despite his limitations. Jashun was in college when he had a brain aneurysm. Jashun shared that is was by the grace of God that his room mate was still there to find him after it occurred and to help him rush to the hospital. After Jashun endured his TBI he found himself limited, but chose to press on. He desired greatly to go back to ECU where he received the TBI to finish his degree that he began. After a lot of hard work and never giving up Jashun went back to ECU, graduated and found a job in his field. His face radiated the joy that his accomplishments and his faith brought forth.

One thing that each Thriver had in common other than a life changing traumatic event, was that each never gave up and refused to accept the limits that were placed upon them. These powerful stories were tremendously encouraging. Allow the success of others to motivate and grow a desire for success in your own circumstances no matter how great or how small. In the words of these great motivators, own your story,  never give up, press on, persevere, aim up, reach to the next level, move from Survivor to Thriver and share your story with others because everytime you encourage others with your story, it truly becomes a special day!

Written By: Jessica Felix Jager, MSW



Monday, September 19, 2011

Grieving Losses Due to a TBI

 
A person with a Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) faces many challenges and losses. Grieving is the process of facing the pain and sorrow of the losses, releasing them and moving on to embrace life. Grieving is the process of both releasing the loss and receiving the comfort and encouragement to move forward.

Comfort comes as we receive love from God, family and friends. "We are mutually strengthened and encouraged and comforted by each others' faith...." Romans 1:12

With every TBI there is some degree of loss. Each injury is different, but they all have one thing in common: loss. Whatever the loss may be, recognizing the stages of grieving will help you process the loss.

Your loved one could experience losses in:
  • Physical Strength
  • Emotional Connections
  • Cognitive Abilities
  • Reasoning and Memory

Never grieve these losses alone.....
  • Find someone who will listen
  • Find someone who understands
  • Find someone who cares

Grieving should not be done alone, everyone needs someone who knows how to listen. There are nine stages of grieving that take you down into a valley. The goal is to keep moving through the valley of grieving until you are on the other side. Having someone walk with you through this process will keep you from getting stuck along the way.

Stages of Grieving
  1. Shock- This stage should last just a few days or weeks.

The Characteristics of Shock:
  • Numbness
  • No feeling
  • No Emotion
  • Lack of Energy
  • Denial
  • Withdrawal
  • Isolation

People who are in shock do not exhibit feelings of grief and mourning over loss. If you are in shock you will feel numb like your living in a fog. Life will be meaningless and empty. You may even act as though the loss never occurred. This is a form of denial, denying the reality of what has happened to you or your family member.

Symptoms of Denial:
  • Do you minimize what has happened?
  • Do you recognize the feelings of grief but minimize those feelings and try to hide them?
  • Do you try to convince yourself, “Everything is fine,” “Nothing has really changed in my life!”

Keys to Recovery
  • Share your feelings with a family member or a friend.
  • Talk about how the loss or changes are affecting you.

  1. Anger

Anger is a legitimate response to your loss. This stage can also last for several years if misunderstood or not ministered through. If you stay in this stage for a long period of time your anger begins to be projected towards others.

Types of anger:
  • Directed towards others; blames others
  • Directed toward self; guilt for what you feel you did or did not do, or should or should not have done. Excessive guilt actually blocks the grieving process.
  • Anger at God- How could He let it happen?
  1. Sadness

Sadness is a natural and healthy emotional response to loss, but it is an emotion most people try to avoid. Therefore they take on physical symptoms such as stomachaches, headaches or loss of energy. Unfortunately, many grieving individuals get stuck and unconsciously adapt the “sick person” role in an effort to get their emotional need for comfort met.

When you face what you have lost, great sadness is felt. A time of sadness is part of the grieving process that must be embraced to move to the next stage. God has promised in Psalm 30:5 that sadness will end soon and joy will come in the morning.
  1. Face the Loss

The next stage is facing the loss, “This really did happen. I really have lost something or someone that was very precious to me.” This is a major key in the grieving process.

Keys to Recovery
Make a list of losses due to your injury….
  • Personality
  • Clear Thinking
  • Friends
  • Mobility
  • Job


Facing the reality of what has been lost is hard as you notice on the grieving chart you are almost at the bottom and that is how it feels, you feel like you are hitting bottom. You finally realize that everything has changed and everything will be different.
  1. Forgiveness

Forgiving others is the next stage of grieving. This is the turning point, when you pass through this stage you will begin to go up hill from this point on. Who do you forgive?
-        Forgive the one you are blaming for the loss
-        Forgive yourself if you still blame yourself
-        Forgive God if you are blaming Him

Forgiveness is a major part of grieving because you can't fully grieve what you have lost until you have forgiven the one or ones you are blaming for this loss.

Types of anger:
  • Directed towards others, blame others 
  •  Anger at God- How could He let it happen?
  • Directed toward self; guilt for what you feel you did or did not do, or should or should not have done. Excessive guilt actually blocks the grieving process.
  1. Release

Once you have forgiven, then you can begin releasing what or who you have lost. To release means you let them go, you are no longer trying to hold on to them and control the outcome.
  1. Facing Reality of the Loss

Many people get confused when they face the loss again, they may feel some of the same emotions as before such as sadness, or anger. But if forgiveness has been accomplished you will pass through this stage very quickly.

Every time you face the loss you must make the choice to grieve and release it again. When you do not have the opportunity to grieve losses, they will begin to pile up, one on top of the other. Instead of processing each loss as it comes, piling them up will cause depression, hopelessness and despair and may even lead to mental and physical problems. In this state even small losses will seem monumental. This is why it is vitally important to deal with and grieve each loss as it occurs.
  • Don’t let things pile up
  • Deco pressurize- talk things out daily
  • If you feel sad, talk about it

When you do no have the opportunity to grieve losses, they will begin to pile up, one on top of the other.
  1. Final Release

At some point in time it is important that a final release takes place. When this happens you will actually feel as if a heavy weight has been removed. This bring you to a place of accepting that life will be different. You will feel lighter, more at peace, and begin to have an increased hope and expectation of what God is going to do in the future.
  1. Acceptance

Full acceptance will come in time. The reality is that life is different. As you have gone through the grieving process you have gained strength to be able to accept your new life with the changes. Acceptance brings a lasting peace to your heart and mind.

Keys to Recovery:
  • In time…and in every situation, when we put our faith in God, He will work all things together for good.
  • Make a list of things and people you are thankful for.
  • If you practice having a thankful heart each day, with God’s help you can overcome the difficulties of each day.

“And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:7

Article Written By: Denise Boggs

Friday, September 9, 2011

In Remembrance


 The after math, the shock, the impact, the loss, the pain, the forever changed Nation will once again come to a pause on September 11, 2011, when we all stop and take a moment to reflect and remember those that were lost and wounded a decade ago. Many of us can still remember where we were when we heard of the terrorist attacks on our Nation. I recall sitting in my first period class my senior year in High School. The rest of the day all of my teachers did nothing but watch the news as we all sat in awe and fear. This event that went down in history stays with us because of how it impacted us. Those that were impacted in severe ways who were there on the scene or survived the attack carry this impact with them in far greater ways that we may never fully understand.

Statistics from an article titled “Traumatic Brain Injuries after Mass-Casualty Incidents: Lessons from the 11 September 2001 World Trade Center Attacks,” show that from the 282 records that were abstracted from those that were hospitalized in New York City, found 14 cases of diagnosed Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) victims and 21 cases of undiagnosed TBI victims, making a total of 35 cases. This study showed that one-third of these cases consisted of rescue workers and that these cases resulted primarily from the falling debris. (Rutland-Brown et. al, 2007). There were probably many more that survived that resulted with some level of a TBI that went undiagnosed for sometime after this traumatic event. The reality here is that this attack on our Nation not only caused irreversible emotional wounds for left behind family members that lost their loved one, but it also caused irreversible physical wounds for those that survived.

According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Center for Disease Control and Prevention, severe head trauma is the most common cause of death in terrorist bombings and has been identified as a major injury in over half of those critically injured in such incidents (2009).  Traumatic Brain Injuries, whether mild, moderate or severe, can happen to anyone, at any time and is becoming one of the leading causes of death and disability among young people. The cases of diagnosed TBI’s and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) have increased significantly after the tragic event of September 11, 2001.


In an effort to defend our Nation against future attacks of this caliber, many have sacrificed who they once were. Many survivors of September 11, 2001, rescue workers and our troops now live lives re-learning how to once again be and function in the land that they fought to keep free. Let us never forget all that was lost for the freedoms we have today. Let us in honor of these selfless and heroic individuals live a life in remembrance and gratitude. This will bring far greater honor than a yearly moment of silence.




                                                                         References

Rutland-Brown, W., Langlois, J.A., Nicaj, L., Thomas, R.B., Wilt, S.A., & Razarian, J.J.
(2007). Traumatic brain injuries after mass-casualty incidents: Lessons from the 11 September 2001 World Trade Center attacks. Prehospital and Disaster Medicine, 22, Vo.l. 3. Abstract retrieved September 8, 2011, from http://pdm.medicine.wise.edu

U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Center for Disease Control and
Prevention. (2009). Blast Injuries: Traumatic brain injuries, June 2009. Available
from Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) Web site, www.emergency.cdc.gov/Blastinjuries 

Article Written By: Jessica Felix Jager, MSW