A Memorial of Puzzle Pieces

The word memorial according to the English Dictionary when used in its noun form means something serving as a remembrance. More often than not, the things we ought to forget, we remember and the things we ought to remember, we forget. Life happens. We get busy and suddenly the memory of a lesson learned escapes us and many of us find ourselves repeating patterns in our circumstances and relationships. It is imperative to remember the lessons we have learned in this life so that we can move forward and face the next obstacle or lesson that awaits us. Everything we experience can be seen as a collection of puzzle pieces. Every place, person, situation, hardship, season, love gained or lost, accident, traumatic event, achievement and so forth can  figuratively be seen as acquired puzzle pieces. These pieces when combined create the greater picture of your life story. Each piece is essential, each piece carries a lesson learned, each piece is needed equally to complete who it is that you are becoming one day at a time. When we fail to hold on to these pieces or "memories" we for all intent and purpose allow life to happen all the while missing the meaning behind it all.

So what can one do to remember the things that they ought to remember? There are many practical solutions out there such as: using a planner, writing things down in a diary, setting reminders on your phone or leaving sticky notes in places that you frequently traffic such as the refrigerator and so on. These practical methods have proven to help and be effective. However, there is no limit to creativity and so the possibilities are endless. Take pictures to capture moments. Keep something from a place you visited as a memorabilia. Create a tradition. Every year when the day that my mother passed away comes around I do something that makes me think of her, such as pick flowers, go to Baskin Robins or watch Gone with the Wind. This reminds me of the precious life she had and brings forth good memories of the years that I was blessed with her. Share your story. Every opportunity that comes your way for you to share a lesson learned may help another and will allow you to remember your lesson all over again while gaining a sense of purpose. David Riesman in "Books: Gunpowder of the Mind" stated that, "people tend to remember best the things they have felt most deeply"(Frank, 2001). Celebrate your own personal holiday. A National Holiday has been established specifically to remember our loved ones that have fought for our honor and freedom. We call this Holiday Memorial Day. As we celebrate Memorial Day take the time to remember those that have impacted us, and take the time to creatively come up with your own personal memorials so that the things you ought to remember will no longer be forgotten. The possibilities to create something that serves as a memorial are endless……...


Article Written By: Jessica Felix Jager, MSW

References

Frank, L.R. (2001). Quotationary. New York, NY: Random House Inc.

http://dictionary.reverso.net/english-definition/memorial

Pursuing Hope

"You will be secure, because there is hope; you will look about you and take your rest in safety." - Job 11:18

Trauma is the unique individual experience of an event or enduring conditions in which the individuals ability to integrate his/her emotional experience is overwhelmed and the individual experiences (either objectively or subjectively) a threat to his/her life, bodily integrity, or that of a caregiver or family (Saakvitne, K. et al, 2000). No one can predict when a traumatic event will occur to them or to a loved one. All trauma is different and affects each individual in different ways, but there is one constant, and that is spontaneity. Trauma occurs spontaneously. Even if a traumatic experience is planned out by a perpetrator for example, the victim is still naive as to what is about to occur to them. With that being said, all one can do to prepare for any sort of trauma in their lives, is to hold on to the truth that trauma may occur, but to never lose hope, because security is found in hope.

Some may find their security in their home, their job, their family or their friends. These areas may seem stable and secure at the time being, however, a natural disaster can tear apart a home in a matter of seconds. The economy can affect one's job and take away all plans of retirement and family can be torn apart for various reasons including the loss of a loved one through a traumatic accident. The reality is that all things as we know it can one day no longer be as it was. The hope however, can be found by holding on to what is truly stable and secure and will never change, leave, or forsake through the worst of times and the best of times. This hope can be found in God. If one is rooted in Him then like Job when all things that once were, are no longer and become uprooted, God will replant and restore all that was lost turning things back to good. 

More often than not, when there are losses or hardships in our lives, many will lose heart. Their faith gets challenged and they get stuck allowing fear to hold them back. John F. Kennedy once said, "We should not let our fears hold us back from pursuing our hopes" (Cook, 1996). If we realistically admit that all things are unstable, unpredictable and unreliable outside of God, then when those hard times or unpredictable, possibly even traumatic events occur, hope can still be found by holding on to the stability and promises found in Him.

Allow the hope of a new tomorrow to get you through the reality of today. Then you too can be like Job, that after losing all, gained much more than he could have ever imagined possible. 

"The Lord blessed the latter part of Job's life more than the first." - Job 42:12


Article Written By: Jessica Felix Jager, MSW

References

Cook, J. (1996). The Book of Positive Quotations. Minneapolis, MN: Fairview Press.

Saakvitne, K., Gamble, S, Pearlman L, & Tabor Lev, B (2000). Risking Connection: A Training Curriculum for Working with Survivors of Childhood Abuse. Baltimore, MD: Sidran Press.